Hello readers, my old friends. I’ve come to update you again! (If you didn’t sing that to the tune of Simon & Garfunkel’s The Sound of Silence, we aren’t real friends…)
It’s been 2 months since you guys have gotten a full update from me. I know most of you follow me on Facebook or Instagram so you see my journey unfold as it’s happening, however, this is more for those of you who want the entire story, not just a few frustrating or successful posts that I chose to share as the days creep by.
Let me first start by saying that this has been the most amazing journey so far. I was thinking today on my drive back in from visiting my family out in the country that my life is no longer focused on food. It’s strange how that happened, but it’s true. I used to think to myself, I can’t go out there because they won’t have any food I like, or they will judge me for eating a midnight snack while I’m supposed to be sleeping. This time, I told them I wanted some queso or guacamole and that was the end of it. After I helped my sister move stuff into her new (and super adorable) house, we went to pick up food for the crew. I ate 3 bites of some nacho toppings and that was entirely too much. I felt like I had overdone it. A few hours later I had a small handful of peanut butter M&Ms and I was ready for bed. I wasn’t focused on food the whole time I was there. It’s so strange to not get cravings like I used to. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do still get them but they are very short lived and I’m able to continue focusing on real life while craving something, unlike before when I would obsess and stop everything until I got whatever it was that I wanted.
Speaking of helping the family move, it was a toasty day yesterday. Usually, on hot days, I avoid all activity because my heart starts going insane and I end up with a heart rate of 170+ just from getting out of my car and walking into the house. Not this time! I was outside taking things upstairs and through hallways like a champ. My heart rate never once got over 150 – through I was a bit cranky because I was sweaty. I really really really hate to sweat.
My diet hasn’t been the best as of lately. I was doing good with the keto thing until I realized that I simply just love things with carbs in them far too much. I still manage to keep at or below 800 calories a day which is what my surgeon has recommended. Only 2 times have I gone over my 800 calorie goal and it was due to some kind of celebration. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about eating since I’ve had this surgery, it’s that I simply cannot multitask and eat a meal at the same time. When I’m eating, I have to take one bite, stop what I’m doing and truly focus on chewing, swallowing, and waiting at least 5 minutes before my next bite. If I’m talking to someone, watching TV, or driving, that focus is gone and sure enough, I make myself super nauseated and spend the next 30 minutes with a barf cup near my mouth. It brings a whole new meaning to mindful eating.
Vitamins – UGH! I cannot stomach the big huge chewable bariatric vitamins that I’m supposed to take. The moment they get past my esophagus and into my belly, they come right back up. I’m been wearing supplemental patches to get some of the vitamins and nutrients that I’ve been lacking from my diet. So far, it’s the only way for me to get everything I need without taking 52 different pills each day. I stick 5 patches to my body each day. It’s a more expensive route than the big chewable tablets, but if I’m barfing them up anyway, they aren’t really doing me much good no matter how inexpensive they are.
Protein – Meeting my 90g of protein each day is next to impossible. I’m doing good to make it to 60 or 70 grams. From what I hear, this will get easier with time, but for now, it just seems like a crazy unreachable goal.
Speaking of goals! When I found out that my surgery was scheduled for February 14th, I made a personal goal for myself that by my birthday I wanted to be at or under 250 pounds. Tuesday is my birthday and I’m SO proud to say that on Friday morning I weighed in at 249.1! There’s an insane sense of accomplishment and pride that comes with almost every weigh-in. Every time I notice clothing fitting differently or jewelry sliding off or even my shoes slipping right off of my feet, I can’t help but get the tremendous sense of pride. No one has done this but me. I feel better, I have more energy, I’m happier, I have tons more confidence in myself and it’s just a wonderful feeling that I expect to only grow stronger as more time passes.
I promised that I would keep this post pretty short. All in all, there’s really nothing too terribly bad about this process. I do miss eating straight scrambled eggs and getting food drunk on gobs of hot bread while waiting for my food to arrive at restaurants, but those will happen again with time. I also miss being able to chug water like a fish! For now though, I’m enjoying the freedom of not having to think about food 100% of the time. It’s a nice break from the past, that’s for sure.
It’s time for me to get my beauty rest. (HAHAHA!)
Stay gorgeous my sweet friends.